Excuse me! EXCUSE ME!! I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY!

We have a problem.

An issue?

A challenge?

No, this really feels like a problem. And I’m putting it out to you, dear readers, for help.

Zozo, who is scared of his own shadow, has started speaking up. Not just speaking up, yelling.

FedEx truck pulls up?
“GUYS!! GUYS!! THERE IS A TRUCK IN OUR TERRITORY. WE MUST SHOUT AT HIM UNTIL HE RETREATS. SHOUT WITH ME!”

A kid rides by on a bicycle?
“There is human puppy driving a contraption! GO AWAY! WHERE ARE YOU GOING? WHAT ARE YOU RIDING? WHERE ARE YOU GOING?!”

A doorbell rings on TV, and he loses it at the door (note: we don’t have a doorbell. We have a knocker. Let’s not even talk about that.) A car door slams and he can see it’s me or James, he wigs. MJ chortles in her sleep; WOOF WOOF.

We’re tried a terse “No.” We’ve tried an abrupt “Uh Uh.” We’ve tried to redirect his attention or focus on completing a cue (Place. Sit. Down.) Dulcet, calming tones. We’ve tried.

Barks abound.

I’ve read around, but…. Who has suggestions? Have you tempered your barker?

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4 thoughts on “Excuse me! EXCUSE ME!! I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY!

  1. “Have I tempered my barker?” Now THAT’S FUNNY!! BOL! I live with a Shetland Sheepdog! His JOB is to BARK!
    He barks at:
    spray butter
    cooking spray
    the coffee pot turning off
    leaves blowing outside
    the mailman
    fedex
    commercials on TV
    the cat
    Get the idea?
    Looks like I am the WRONG one to ask lol

  2. We tempered our deaf pit bull (who barked at EVERYTHING she saw) by luring her over to the kitchen sink and giving her a treat when she sat. It took a long time, because initially, as soon as she got the treat, she would fly back to the door/window to bark some more. Finally, she sat until released and figured out one or two barks was good- her job was done.

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